09.28.2004
11:50 a.m.
Shitty day
It's hard to pinpoint exactly when my morning went so bad. (Though it got even worse just a minute ago when my computer did something weird, and I lost the mostly-done entry I had just typed here.)
I was fine in the shower.
I think it started when I had to hurdle the large and incredibly heavy Universal Power Supply that is currently sitting in the middle of the office floor. It's annoying enough when I have to jump over it once or twice in order to get clothes out of my closet or armoire, but this morning it was the epitome of annoying when I had to make umpteen trips into the office to try to find clothes that both looked good and fit me. If I had bought the pants I'd wanted at Old Navy last time, I could have worn the 4 or so sweaters and shirts I wanted to wear this morning.
I need to do laundry tonight. Many, many loads of laundry.
I need to figure out how to get the UPS downstairs and into the trash so it stops ruining my mornings.
I also need to get rid of all of the size 3 and 5 pants that are currently taking up room in my wardrobe. Even if I do lose weight, chances are that I'll never be able to fit in a size 3 again (without reverting to unhealthy habits). Trying to put those on in the morning is a great way to destroy your self-esteem. I could still wear them if it was in fashion to wear pants that only went up to your knees.
While I did my makeup, I realized I was really freaking tired of my green contacts. I made a mental note to grab my contact box and stick it in my purse so I could order new contacts today at work. I can't wait for a bonus in order to get them. I want them NOW. Did I bring them? Why no, I did not.
Then I saw my husband with his name badge on, and asked him where he was going today. Last night while watching TV, he said he was thinking he wasn't going to Muskegon today, because Karen seemed to have things pretty well under control. I asked him where he would be then, and he said "home", thus leading me to believe that he'd be home tonight. And yet, apparently not. So, that was a disappointment.
I do wish that if plans to be home weren't carved in stone, that he wouldn't even mention it to me. I hate being disappointed and sad when I think he'll be home on a night when he's actually not going to be.
By the time I actually found something to wear, I was running late. I ran downstairs, fed the cats, and attempted to put together something to bring for breakfast, snacks, and lunch today. Unfortunately, I (once again) didn't make the mini quiches I bring for breakfast, so I decided to stop somewhere to get something before work. I just threw a few things I found in the fridge into my lunchbag. I also looked at the giant stack of dishes in the sink that should have been done last night, and reminded myself that I needed to do them tonight. JOY! I love the back aches I get from doing dishes for an hour in our deep sinks.
On the way out, I told my husband I'd see him "whenever" because I had no idea when the next time I'd see him was.
I got into my car and it barely started. Then I realized I had to get gas. So, I drive to the gas station, pull up in front of my usual pump, and insert my debit card. It sits there for a few minutes, apparently THINKING, while I wrap my arms around myself and try to stay warm. (I was wearing a THIN long-sleeved blouse and no coat.) Then, it says "SEE ATTENDANT" and starts beeping loudly at me.
I go inside, and ask the attendant why I have to see her. She says, "Oh, I guess pre-pay isn't working on that pump. You can either pay inside or move to a different pump." I pay her, and go back out to my car to freeze my ass off while my gas pumps.
By this point I'm nearly in tears. I realize that because the gas pump was being a bastard, I now no longer have time to stop and get something for breakfast at a drive-thru. Eh, who needs food anyway?
I get to work, and my officemate tells me that downloads are being really slow. (For the record, as of 12:09 pm, they're STILL not done yet. Normally they finish by 8:15 or so.) I go back into the computer room to change the backup tapes and take a chunk out of my thigh with the corner of the desk. FUCKING OW.
I was ready to give up and go home at that point. But, I can't. I need to be here so I can endure my daily torture.
All in all, it's been a REALLY shitty day. And no matter how much I'd like to go home tonight, get into pajamas, crawl into bed, and put the covers over my head, I know that I need to possibly run to Old Navy, do at least 3 loads of laundry, do the dishes, and make mini quiches for the rest of the week.
*sigh*
Is it Saturday yet?
Food I'm craving: a salad from Burger King, but only if the lettuce doesn't SUCK
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