04.03.2003
4:34 p.m.
Just to clear something up
-I am not a "5 Minute Man," and do not need help with my performance.
-I do not want free Pay Per View.
-I do not want to enlarge my penis by 1-3 inches.
-I do not have a need for diabetic socks. (I'm still trying to figure out how I got on the list for that one.)
-I do not need or want Viagra, Human Growth Hormone, or legal steroids.
-I do not want to look at free webcams.
-I have no interest whatsoever in looking at women with horses/dogs/any other animal.
-I never posted a message to you on any personal ad site, and I don't want to check out your free site now.
-I do not want to increase my breast size - naturally! (Well, I'd like to, but I don't believe that crap actually works.)
-I am not worried about money. (This is a lie.)
-I don't need another mortgage.
-I don't want to make money for reading my e-mail.
-I don't want to send money to some strange person coming from a foreign country, who will then give me more than I gave them.
-I don't want to copy DVDs to CDs.
-I don't want to find out anything about anyone.
-I don't need to find out what my spouse and/or children are doing on the internet.
-I'm pretty sure I didn't actually win a free vacation.
Okay? So quit sending me shitty spam e-mails, you random people with no lives! Just stop it!
Ahhhh...now I feel better.
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