11.07.2005
7:11 p.m.
It's November now... Yikes.
I think God hates me. I had horrible heartburn this afternoon, even after I found one precious Prilosec OTC in my purse and took it. HORRIBLE heartburn.
Why?
Because I was supposed to go out for drinks after work tonight.
Damn it.
I felt terrible until just a few minutes ago, when it switched over to a slightly-hungry-but-still-somewhat-crappy feeling.
Damn, damn, double damn.
Hopefully next time we set up a day for drinks, my body won't stage a revolt.
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I realized while listening to the news last Tuesday morning while getting ready that it was November 1st. This freaked me out for two reasons:
1) The first of the month = month-end = pain in the ass, and
2) It's now November, which means my freaking birthday is this month.
Birthdays never used to worry me. I actually used to look forward to them. Last year and this year, though, I've felt a strong sense of dread associated with being another year older.
I'm not entirely sure what that's about, but I have a hunch that it has to do with goals, and the lack of accomplishment of said goals.
For several years there, not having done what I fully intended to do by that age didn't upset me too much. I thought, "I may not have a degree yet, but I'm only 22 (23, 24). I have plenty of time." Once I hit 25, that was only 5 years away from 30. Now I'll be turning 26. That's only FOUR YEARS AWAY FROM 30!!!
So, the bad news is that I feel like a slacker and an underachiever on pretty much a yearly basis.
The good news is that I finally have a way to fix that.
A few weekends ago, Mr. Science-Girl and I sat down and looked seriously at what I/we needed to do in order to earn my Associate's Degree. The next Monday, we set the plan into motion.
I signed up to take General Chemistry I and American Government beginning on January 10th of next year.
I expect that I will probably be working around 45-50 hours a week those first few weeks in January, in addition to going to school on Tuesday and Thursday nights. Tuesday nights I'll have a lab until 10:15 PM.
Hi. I am completely insane.
Luckily, American Government is a telecourse, which means I get to take it on my own time. Whoo hoo!
Next summer, I'll get to take General Chemistry II and Critical Thinking.
In the fall of 2006, I will FINALLY be able to enact the plan I've been scheduling and pushing back and scheduling and pushing back for at least a year now. We will finally have the resources available for me to be able to quit working full-time, so I can go back to school full-time.
Seriously, for real, this time.
Of course, this will be in large part because the first two semesters of me going back to school will involve me stashing massive quantities of money from my paycheck into my savings account. Hopefully I'll have enough saved that I don't have to come to my husband for money all the time while I'm doing the full-time student gig.
I think I'll be fine. I might be risking burn-out from January to May, but hopefully it won't be nearly as bad as I'm afraid it might be.
The semester (Winter 2007) that involves me taking Organic Chemistry II, College Physics II and Trigonometry at the same time, however, might actually lead to my death. I'm going to try not to think about that until I actually come to it.
I need to just take things one day at a time, one class at a time, one 4.0 at a time.
Now that I think about it, turning 26 doesn't sound that bad after all.
Listening to: Az crying. Poor sick kitty.
Reading: Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
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