05.16.2003 10:05 a.m.
Smooth Talker

I am SUCH a smooth talker... I had an appointment for an annual exam this morning. THAT is such a fun way to start your day, let me tell you. Getting weighed, measured, peeing in a cup, getting stabbed in the finger (I didn't have to! HA!), blood pressure, temperature, heart rate checked by the nurse. Then having the doctor (in my case, Physician's Assistant) come in and asking a ton of questions, trying to convince me to get a tetanus shot, then doing a breast exam and finally a pap smear and ovary check. Fun, fun stuff.

At least I avoided both possibilities for being stabbed my needles. The nurse went to get out the needle to poke my finger, and I said, "Okay, for the last seven years I've been tested for anemia, and I've NOT ONCE been anemic. I eat red meat, I take vitamins, I'm not malnourished. Can we just say that I'm not anemic without having to stab me?"

She said, "No, we don't have to do that. We can just skip it."

I thought, "HA HA! I win!"

Then when my PA came in, and reminded me that I was actually OVERdue for a tetanus shot, as my last one had been in 1990, I talked her out of that as well. She said, "You don't HAVE to have it, but I'd recommend it."

I said, "I'd rather not. If I step on a rusty nail or something they'll give me a tetanus booster in the emergency room. Until then, I don't need any more weird crap floating around in my body. I have enough already."

She laughed and said, "Okay." VICTORY NUMBER TWO!!!

The next time I get stabbed by a needle, I want it to be a tattoo needle. After that, it will probably be an IV or shot of sedative when I get my tooth taken out. Joy.

Yes, I am a weenie. But, at least I'm honest about it. *grin*

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